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12 Inspiring Ways Truly Alive People Approach Life

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To quote the great philosopher—Forest Gump—“Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what your gonna get.”

So true. But why is it that some people get boxes filled only with the finest chocolates? Life may certainly be unpredictable, but truly alive people approach life in a way that squeezes out the positives from the unpredictable.

Marcus Aurelius said, “When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive – to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.”

Here are 12 inspiring ways truly alive people approach life:

1. They’re unrealistic. 

They prefer to live in the ‘impossible.’ They believe that people crazy enough to think they can change the world, actually do (Steve Jobs).

For the longest time, everybody thought it was impossible to break the four-minute mile. Everybody except Roger Bannister. If he was realistic about things than who knows when, or if that barrier would’ve been broken.

Shoot for the moon, if you miss you’ll land among the stars—cliché, but truth. It is so much better to aim high, and potentially miss, than to aim low and be sure to hit.

2. They adjust with the seasons.

They understand that everything has its season. And they flow in synch with the lifespan of that experience. They know when it’s time to change careers; when they’ve outgrown a position, a relationship, or a stage in life—and they take the appropriate action.

To be truly alive, is to move with the seasons in life. They’re not living in winter and expecting warm weather. They don’t start a new career and immediately expect the big bucks. They understand when it is time to sow, and when it is time to harvest.

Don’t mistake a tough season—a tough experience—for a miserable year. Everything has its season.

3. They can laugh at themselves.

They’ve turned their ego into an Oopma Loompa that can be laughed at. They take themselves a little less serious than the world expects. Truly alive people get out on the dance floor even with two left feet, and get on stage like they’re singing in the shower.

What’s life without a ton of laughter? When people are laughing at you rather than with you, join them. It’s healthy not to take yourself too serious.

4. They keep adding to their Bucket List.

They see life as a journey of growth; not just collecting stamps, but new experiences.

Truly alive people know that without aspirations and goals, stagnancy will surely set in. Life becomes dull when it becomes predictable—even people in Hawaii can get bored of the beach.

So keep setting new horizons, when you knock something off your list, add another.

5. They take criticism like water off a duck’s back.

Truly alive people cause others to think about their own lifestyle. Some people get inspired, others get annoyed.

Trying to please everyone in life will only result in frustration. No matter how hard you try, there will always be those who find a way to criticise. You can either develop thick skin, or become a sponge soaking up all the negativity.

The former will keep you sane, the latter will drive you insane

6. They look in the rear-view mirror.

They reflect. Often.

Danish philosopher Søren Kierkegaard said, “Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.”

While you never want to dwell too deeply on a negative event, reflecting on what you have done well, and what you could improve on, is a great practice for making positive future decisions.

The past can be a great teacher.

7. Pain drives them, rather than defeats them.

They know at every given moment, they can choose to play the victim, or the victor. They see obstacles as opportunities, and turn their scars into strengths.

History has shown us that there is no situation so tragic in life, that the human spirit is not able to overcome.

8. They wear their heart on their sleeve

They stand for something, and they’re not ashamed of it.

Alexander Hamilton said, “Those who stand for nothing, fall for anything.”

The United States Declaration of Independence recognises the importance of expressing what you believe; that life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness flourishes in the positive expression of your will.

Seek out the message that speaks to your soul. Embrace it. Unashamed.

9. They run their own race.

Because comparison is crippling.

It can quickly rob your well deserved celebration when you place your accomplishment next to someone who’s doing ‘better.’

There’s only one you in this world, don’t try and run like the person beside you. You have your own stride, your own style, your own voice, and your own pace. When you understand that—not only will you truly be able to celebrate your own victories—you can sincerely celebrate the victory of others without any jealousy.

10. They “re-calculate” after wrong turns.

We all make bad decisions. But losing a battle doesn’t mean losing the war.

Truly alive people allow their life-GPS to go into “re-calculating” mode. They roll with any punches and keep heading toward their destination. They are flexible with the journey because they are determined and sure about their destination.

Be absolutely clear on your goals, generate a powerful enough “Why.” If you stray off course, you’re strong momentum will carry you where you need to be.

11. They Don’t Bottle-Up Emotions.

In times of sadness, truly alive people allow tears do their healing work. If they’re upset with someone, they lovingly address the issue. When they’re celebrating, the whole neighbourhood knows about it.

When emotions trigger off the welling in your eyes, the release should not be restrained. You’ve been told to listen to your body when it comes to food, sleep, and rest—that advice should be applied when emotions are calling to be expressed.

12. They watch sunsets.

Because regardless of how hectic and frustrating the day can be, truly alive people know they can count on the simple, yet profound reminder that there’s always something to smile and be thankful for.

Let the sun set, and take with it your fears, concerns, and struggles.

“With the new day comes new strength and new thoughts.”

― Eleanor Roosevelt

Callum Connects

Benjamin Kwan, Co-Founder of TravelClef

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Making music to create a life for his family, Benjamin Kwan, started an online tuition portal and his music business grew from there.

What’s your story?
I am Benjamin and I’m the Co-Founder of TravelClef Group Pte Ltd, a travelling music school that conducts music classes in companies as well as team building with music programmes. We also run an online educational platform which matches private students to freelance music teachers. We also manufacture our own instruments. I started this company in 2011 when I was still a freshman at NUS, majoring in Mechanical Engineering.

I was born to a lower income family, my father drove a taxi and was the sole breadwinner to a family of 7. I have always dreamed of becoming rich so that I could lessen the burden placed on my father and give my family a good life.

After working really hard in my first semester at NUS, my results didn’t reflect the hard work and effort I put in. At the same time, I was left with just $42 in my bank account and it suddenly dawned on me that if I were to graduate with mediocre results, I would probably end up with a mediocre salary as well. I knew I had to do something to gain control of my future.

During that summer break, I read a book “Internet Riches” by Scott Fox and I knew that the only way I could ever start my own business with my last $42 would be to start an online business. That was how our online tuition portal started and after taking 4 days to learn Photoshop and website building on my own, I started the business.

What excites you most about your industry?
Music itself is a constant form of excitement to me as I have always been an avid lover of music. As one of the world’s first travelling music schools, we are always very eager and excited to find innovative ways to a very traditional business model of a music teaching.

What’s your connection to Asia?
I was born and raised in Singapore and I love the fact that despite our diversity in culture, there’s always a common language that we share, music.

Favourite city in Asia for business and why?
Hands down, SINGAPORE! Although we are currently in talks to expand to other regions within Asia, Singapore is the best place for business. I have had friends asking me if they should consider venturing into entrepreneurship in Singapore, my answer is always a big fat YES! There’s a low barrier of entry, and most importantly, the government is very supportive of entrepreneurship.

What’s the best piece of advice you ever received?
I have been blessed by many people and mentors who constantly give me great advice but right now, I would say the best piece of advice that I received would be from Dr Patrick Liew who said, “Work on the business, not in it.” This advice is constantly ringing in my head as I work towards scaling the business.

Who inspires you?
My dad. My dad has always been my inspiration in life, for the amount of sacrifices that he has made for the family and the love he has for us. He was the umbrella for all the storms that my family faced and we were always safe in his shelter. Although my dad passed away after a brief fight with colorectal cancer, the lessons that he imparted to me were very valuable as I build my own family and business.

What have you just learnt recently that blew you away?
You can not buy time, but you can spend money to save time! With this realisation, I was willing to allow myself to spend some money, in order to save more time. Like taking Grab/Uber to shuttle around instead of spending time travelling on public transport. While I spend more money on travelling, I save a lot more time! This doesn’t mean that I spend lavishly and extravagantly, I am still generally prudent with my money.

If you had your time again, what would you do differently?
I would have taken more time to spend with my family and especially my father. While it is important to focus our time to build our businesses, we should always try our best to allocate family time. Because as an entrepreneur, there is no such thing as “after I finish my work,” because our work is never finished. If our work finishes, the business is also finished. But our time with our family is always limited and no matter how much money and how many successes we achieve, we can never use it to trade back the time we have with our family.

How do you unwind?
I am a very simple man. I enjoy TV time with my wife and a simple dinner with my family and friends.

Favourite Asian destination for relaxation? Why?
Batam, it’s close to Singapore and there’s really nothing much to do except for massages and a relaxing resort life. If I travel to other countries for shopping or sightseeing, I am constantly thinking of business and how I can possibly expand to the country I am visiting. But while relaxing at the beach or at a massage, I tend to allow myself to drift into emptiness and just clear my mind of any thoughts.

Everyone in business should read this book:
Work The System, by Sam Carpenter. This book teaches entrepreneurs the importance of creating systems and how to leverage on systems to improve productivity and create more time.

Shameless plug for your business:
If you are looking for a team building programme that your colleagues will enjoy and your bosses will be happy with, you have to consider our programmes at TravelClef! While our programmes are guaranteed fun and engaging, it is also equipped with many team building deliverables and organizational skills.

How can people connect with you?
My email is [email protected] and I am very active on Facebook as well!
https://www.facebook.com/benjamin.christian.kwan

This interview is part of the ‘Callum Connect’ series of more than 500 interviews

Callum Laing is an entrepreneur and investor based in Singapore. He has previously started, built and sold half a dozen businesses and is now a Partner at Unity-Group Private Equity and Co-Founder of The Marketing Group PLC. He is the author two best selling books ‘Progressive Partnerships’ and ‘Agglomerate’.

Connect with Callum here:
twitter.com/laingcallum
linkedin.com/in/callumlaing
Download free copies of his books here: www.callumlaing.com

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Entrepreneurship

Before you enter a Startup or before you choose your founding team or new hires read, “Entering Startupland” by Jeff Bussgang

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Before you enter a Startup or before you choose your founding team or new hires read “Entering Startupland” by Jeff Bussgang.

Jeff knows how to spot and groom good culture, as the book session was held in Zestfinance a company he invested in and now, “The Best Workplaces for Women” and for “The Best Workplaces for Tech”, by Fortune.

These are the questions during the Book Launch.

How to know if a hire including the founder is Startup material?
Jeff says to watch for these qualities.

First, do the hires think like an owner?
Second, do the hires test the limits, to see how things can it be done better?
Are they problem solvers and are biased toward action?
Do they like managing uncertainty and being comfortable with uncertainty? And comfortable with rapid decision-making?
Are they comfortable with flexible enough to take in a series of undefined roles and task?

How do we know if we are simply too corporate to be startup?

Corporate mindsets more interested in going deep into a particular functional area? These corporate beings are more comfortable with clear and distinct lines of responsibility, control, and communication? They are more hesitant or unable to put in the extra effort because “it’s not my job”.

If you do still want to enter a startup despite the very small gains at the onset, Jeff offers a few key considerations on how to pick a right one.

He suggests you pick a city as each city has a different ecosystems stakeholders and funding sources and market strengths. You have to invest in the ecosystem and this is your due diligence. Understand it so you can find the best match when it arises.
Next, to pick a domain, research and solidify your understanding with every informational interview and discussion you begin. Then, pick a stage you are willing to enter at. They are usually 1)in the Jungle, 2) the Dirt Road or 3) the Highway. The Jungle has 1-50 staff and no clear path with distractions everywhere and very tough conditions. The Dirt Road gets clearer but is definitely bumpy and windy. Well the Highway speaks for itself, doesn’t it?

Finally Please – Pick a winner!

Ask people on the inside – the Venture Capitalists, the lawyers, the recruiters and evaluate the team quality like any venture capitalists would. Would you want to work for the team again and again? And is the startup working in a massive market? Is there a clear recurring business model?

After you have picked a winning team and product, how would you get in through the door?

You need to know that warm introductions have to be done. That’s the way to get their attention. Startups value relationships and people as they need social capital to grow. If you have little experience or seemingly irrelevant experience, go bearing a gift. Jeff shared a story of a young ambitious and bright candidate with no tech experience who went and did a thorough customer survey of the users of the startup she intended to work with. She came with point-of-view and presented her findings, and they found in her, what they needed at that stage. She became their Director of Growth. Go in with the philosophy of adding value-add you can get any job you want.

And as any true advisor would do, Jeff did not mince his words, when he reminded the audience that, “If you can’t get introduced you may not be resourceful enough to be in startup.”

Startupland is not a Traditional Career or Learning Cycles

Remember to see your career stage as a runs of 5 years, 8 or 10 – it is not a life long career. In Startup land consider each startup as a single career for you.

Douglas Merrill, founder of Zestfinance added from his hard-earned experience that retention is a challenge. Startup Leaders to keep your people, do help them with the quick learning cycles. Essentially from Jungle to Dirt road, the transition can be rapid and so each communication model that starts and exists, gets changed quickly. Every twelve months, the communication model will have no choice but to break down and you have to reinvent the communication model. Be ready as a founder and be ready as a member of the startup.

Another suggestion was to have no titles for first two years. So that everyone was hands-on and also able to move as one entity.

Effective Startupland Leaders paint a Vision of the Future yet unseen.

What I really enjoyed and resonated with as a coach and psychologist was how Douglas at the 10th hire thought very carefully what he was promising each of his new team member. He was reminded that startups die at their 10th and their 100th hires. He took some mindful down time and reflected. He then wrote a story for each person in his own team and literally wrote out what the company would look like and their individual part in it. In He writing each of the team members’ stories into his vision and giving each person this story, it was a powerful communication piece. He definitely increased the touch points and communication here is the effective startup’s leverage.

Douglas and Jeff both suggested transparency from the onset.

If you think like an owner and if you think of your founding team as problem solvers. Then getting transparent about financials with your team is probably a good idea. As a member of a startup, you should insist on knowing these things
Such skills and domain knowledge will be valuable. There is now historical evidence of people leaving startups and being a successful founder themselves because they were in the financial trenches in their initial startup. Think Paypal and Facebook Mafia.

What drives people to enter a startup?

The whole nature of work is changing. Many are ready to pay to learn. Daniel Pink’s book Drive showed how people are motivated by certain qualities like Mastery, Autonomy and Where your work fits into big picture. Startups do that naturally. There is a huge amount of passion and the quality of team today and as it grows then the quality of company changes.

The Progress principle is in place, why people love their startup jobs is not money rather are my contributions being valued? Do I see a path of progress and do I have autonomy over work and am I treated well?

Find out more about StartupLand on Amazon

And learn from Zestfinance

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